The Cellulite Conundrum and slaying the Monster

We either have it already or we really hope we’ll never get it…
I’ve read so much on this topic – – lots of great creative writing – – lots of science fiction … and often it’s a case of ‘follow the money’.

The therapies and suggestions of present day cellulite banishing has greatly improved. And here are some all-round, wholesome, easy, inexpensive, at-home remedies. Live blood analysis can shed light on whether there are hidden toxins, an over-supply of heavy metals, sluggish lymphatics or hidden culprits.

Just, as a very brief introduction only, there are SO MANY REASONS for cellulite, but they all fall under one heading: LIFE!
NO blame can go to genetics. Yes, there’s more cellulite in one family than another, or more for women than with men…
SO! It’s NOT ‘like mother, like daughter!

The reasons overlap within each family and gender:

  • long periods of sedentary lifestyles
  • years of poor processed foods / diets including the many ‘fresh’ foods with pesticides, herbicides, fungicides and now ever-present glyphosates
  • years of chronic disease and the meds that came with that
  • unseen, mis-understood and undiagnosed dysbiosis
  • diferent kinds of estrogens in food, food packaging and plastic water bottles
  • food shelf-life stabilizers and emulsifiers and ‘natural’ colouring and ‘natural’ flavorings in processed foods
  • not enough hydration
  • terrible quality drinking water
  • environmental toxins, chemtrails and smog…
    and so forth…

Treating one’s lumpy ‘orange peel’ skin takes a lot of patience and love, but worth the effort.

Two Things Have to Occur Simultaneously to Cause Cellulite to Appear: A and B

There has to be an over abundance of toxins (a short set of suggestions above but the list of culprits in today’s world is so very long).
There has to be a decrease of intra-cellular structural-strength – in the matrix holding the body’s cells together. A decrease in collagen is how we usually convey this cellulite conundrum, and it affects the strength of all structures between the cells.

A – about the toxins that have to come out
Our bodies are brilliant and get rid of toxins in many smart ways such as through a well-working healthy intestinal tract, lots of urine flow, good sweating, and even our breath.
The lymphatic system is also in the business of removing toxins that swim around in the extracellular matrix. Once picked up, the nodes process this ‘unwanted stuff’ and move it along. The processed debris passes through the lymph system and deposits the managed toxins into the blood supply in the chest area. Then it’s circulated through the blood to the exits, liver, spllen and other organs! It is amazingly efficient!
That said, some toxins are not all removed easily or naturally – either because the incoming load is too great or our bodies are not in shape to do this completely (such as having a liver that is struggling or white cells that are sluggish or bone marrow that has been damaged and not too eager to make new VIABLE hard working white cells). Think of someone on heavy medications who is dealing with a group of chronic diseases… The medications’ residues are not going to nicely head to the exit as soon as the required effect from the meds have been achieved – there may be an over-abundance or an accumulation. The chronic diseases themselves, along with inflammation, can also be a hindrance to optimum and awesome cellular cleansing activity.
So, the toxins are often parked – for a short time or continuously or for a very long time.
The easiest and least damaging and most elegant place for our brilliant bodies to park this unwanted toxicity, is in the nearest fat cells, and nicely out of harm’s way. Actually very brilliant!

B – about re-strengthening the structures
Over time, over the decades, our basic structural membranes may weaken – the ‘rebar’ holding it all together decreases it’s effectiveness… Our bodies are SO CLEVER that the breakdown of collagen, our structural matrix, viscera, etc, occurs in places where it is least life threatening… And that would be in the fat cells’ areas (rather than in heart muscle or finger tips – to make a point…)
Think of collagen as the thin chicken-wire inside structural glass to make it stronger.
Then the time comes that the chicken-wire unravels a bit here and there and slowly wears away…. and hence the wobbly appearance of the skin. That’s why there can be a lot of cellulite in a relatively lean person and less in an obese person.


A – how to get the toxins out
for working away at reducing the fat cells themselves, you’ll need a scrub and a cream
Here’s the scrub:
* 2 Tbsp top notch organic ground up coffee beans (a biolytic effect and an exfoliate) (Caffeine has a subtle but proven effect on breaking our fats cells down – at least the fat cells closely below the epidermis and corium skin – the ones nearer the surface that benefit from the scrub’s penetration)
* 2 Tbsp unrefined coarse coconut sugar (biolytic effect and an exfoliate)
* 2 Tbsp pulverized top notch green tea leaves
* 2 drops of organic grapefruit essential oil
* 2 drops of organic cypress essential oil

Mix all of the above into 2 Tbsp organic cold-pressed coconut oil until you have a nice paste.
Massage daily, in a circular motion, on all the areas that need it for several minutes.
Jump into the shower.
Gently brush the skin (or even stroke with your hand) to support the lymphatic system while you’re showering (always stroke gently towards the heart – many diagrams online as to how to do this)
Apply vit A cream / Vit A oil after drying off. (personally, I use a glycolic acid cream of 8% or higher (AHA) that penetrates well and stimulates production of collagen).

THEN WE WANT TO DRINK LOTS OF CLEAN (NON-PLASTIC CONTAINER) WATER. We can interchange that with organic green tea (not from China).

Drinking plenty of clean non-alkaline water from glass bottles is vital and a necessity. Potassium and magnesium rich foods are also really crucial as they help the flushing in-and-out action at the cellular level between night and day and sodium and calcium. Only the best fats are a MUST – as they are part of every cell’s outer-membrane – either with toxins within that want to come out or as regular cells that want to remain healthy and not become a dilapidated toxic barrier. 
Backing off the poor salts helps make this automatic flushing of fluids: the day-night and in-and-out action much easier. Good salts are important and misunderstood and are described at:

And shutting down your body’s glycation as much as possible! That’s a big part of reducing the breaking down of structural fibers (including face and surface skin tissue). 
As you probably know, there are different firms of sugars and these sugars become glucose and glycogen.
Sugars are wonderful swift performing fuels. All food – simple sugars, simple carbs, complex carbs and proteins eventually turns to glycogen which leads to blood sugar in our circulation – one way or another. All foods except for fats.
These blood sugar molecules (aside from going into all of our cells as fuel) like to attach themselves to protein and fat molecules – especially attaching to elastin and collagen. This includes our outer skin and inner structural tissue.
If we really over consume, then we have what is called – advanced glycalation end products – and certainly cellulite takes a hit, too. Fibers then become stiffer and even mal-formed and then send messages of inflammation to the receptors and set up more problems – that’s excellerated aging for short with cellulite along for the ride.
So now, we have inflammation in the conversation – best to go down the list of known culprits and reduce them – and this helps to reduce more cellulite from being formed:

The icing on the cake would be frequent ozone/oxygen detoxification saunas – this helps with many health issues, total detoxing as well as cellulite reduction –

B – getting to re-strengthening the structural membranes
For this part, you’ll may need to possibly alter your foods / cooking / diet / etc. And although the repair here is about bringing back a better structural system for your fat cells to be held in place in a more tidy fashion, you can imagine that your skin, hair, artery walls, etc are also thrilled with this attention to collagen details.
Bone broth is your friend in this. Not just any old bone broth, nor commercial bone broth bought from a big box store or out of a can or box or foill lined box! You’ll want wholesome, ‘clean’, bone broth that you make yourself. You need to pick up ORGANIC bones – chicken or beef – from a proper healthy health store. These need to be cooked for a long time on a very low heat… It’s a no brainer and requires NO kitchen know-how other than to put a big pot of water on the stove OR turn on the slow cooker on LOW or 24 hours.

The above is your easiest way, by far, to add Proline and Glycine to your diet – these very essential (often missing) amino acids are the essential  building blocks that should be making your improved rebar all day and night. (Can you imagine concrete without much cement and just the sand and water).
Do this very often and not just once in a blue moon, as your body decides what it will use the Proline and Glycine in the collagen for – and if muscle (heart) and bone marrow repair (indirectly aids the immune system) are deemed more crucial, it may take a little longer for the collagen to be ‘beefed up’ and structural perfection to return, while the amino acids deal with the other emergencies. Bell peppers, strawberries, broccoli, citrus fruits, asparagus, mushrooms and cabbage also contain Proline. Glycine can be eaten through dairy, seeds, nuts, clean fish, spinach, mustard leaves, garlic, broccoli and of cource you’ll wannt to do your own research.

That’s it – and keep it up! 

Merrie Bakker in Vancouver BC at Pacific Holistic

Merrie Bakker B.Sc, M.Arch, CN
by appointment only
We’re still in Kerrisdale, Vancouver, BC
Please email, phone or text 604-261-7742 and

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Follow-up sessions (within ine year) are quicker – $95
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Merrie Bakker – Live Blood Analyst / microscopist – Health Educator – Author – Teacher – Speaker – Editor – Hands-on-Healer – Reflexologist – Dowser – Reiki Master – Nutritional Coach – a life-long student of holistic medicine and preventative health who believes with a passion that cellular disorganization can be prevented or reversed by ortho-molecular medicine, emotional healing work, environmental detoxification (many areas of concern) and nutritional and lifestyle re-balancing (many possibilities). Combined with vigilance, monitoring and team work, clients are encouraged to detox, rebuild, re-nourish, resolve and re-educate.